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Post by Anonymous on Jan 17, 2018 17:18:52 GMT -5
Well, I've had enough, i took shahadah 6 years ago and since then I have fallen out with family and friends, I have become more miserable as each day has gone by. I have tried to find a wife but the dozens if not hundreds of women I have spoken to, its always the same story, family wouldnt allow them to marry a white man, they know if theyre coming or going, one day they want to know everything about you, the next dont want to talk to you again. Im done with it, I'm nothing but miserable. Everyone takes your number when you convert, a week later you hear from none of them again. Im tired of this world. If I had known this is what Islam was like I really wouldnt of bothered. I thought id meet someone, I thought id be happy. Im the complete opposite. Ive never been so miserable in my life.Im not even looking for replies I just wanted to let you all know the real struggles converts face, maybe you can try harder on the next one. Im done.
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Post by Anonymous on Jan 19, 2018 16:50:51 GMT -5
Sorry to hear that, Anon... it sounds like you converted to find social connection with someone or a community. That can work sometimes, but it is usually not the best reason to take on a new religion (which can be demanding in a lot of different ways).
In case you end up changing your mind, several people I know have had luck meeting like-minded partners on online sites for dating and marriage. It might be worth a shot. The most important thing is to figure yourself out, your values and where you want to be in terms of your future life. The advice I have valued in the past is find someone from a compatible background to your own... culture-wise, economic and so on... so that your expectations going forward will be in harmony.
As far as matters of religion go, that is always a personal decision... keep your heart open and listen to the values and truths that seem most intuitive to you. If you take on Islam as something alien to your own conscience and upbringing then you'll quickly find your heart is not in it. The best convert stories are the ones where accepting faith is just a completion of who you already were to begin with, and family members should hopefully see that as a blessing.
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Post by Anonymous on Jan 19, 2018 21:12:18 GMT -5
Who said it was to find social connection or a community? I lived a different life before, a happier one actually, why would i have become muslim? I didnt know any muslims then. There wasnt a girl i converted for. i did it for myself.
Secondly online apps and sites for meeting people are garbage. Pure trash. Like I said i have met countless muslim women. I have had so many pathetic experiences. One called off a meet the other day from a 'gut feeling' and apparently we wernt clicking (after 3 days talking on whatsapp) yeah you tell me the logic behind that.
Not to mention the sites you have to pay for, yeah tried them as well, but the women get them all for free, so the men pay,the women dont, guess what that means, you cant filter out the women who are there to boost their pathetic egos and instawhores looking for more instagram followers or snapchat friends to show off their dog filtered selfies too.
Tbh its more the women that have put me off. The attitude is disgusting, and the more it goes on, the more i find myself actually hating muslims, which is ironic really, i learned about this religion with no racism and everyones equal. Shame its not the same when it comes to marriage. And you might think from reading this my attitude is off, well you try as many times as i have to find someone to complete half my deen and you might feel the same, constant time wasters, constant ridiculous expectations, constant trash.
And yeah youre right, my heart isnt in it anymore. But then what? Renounce it and then i go to hell apparently? Or should i just live the rest of my life without a woman to share it with and grow old and miserable and alone, you tell me because Im seriously at my end with this look for a wife crap
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Post by Anonymous on Jan 19, 2018 22:02:39 GMT -5
To be frank, you are being contradictory... you are talking about leaving Islam, but worrying about hell (which you would presumably no longer believe in?)... you are concerned about finding a Muslim wife, even though you are also saying that you hate Muslims... and who said you need to marry a Muslim anyway? It's not fair to hide your equivocation about faith from a prospective Muslim wife. It sounds like you need to get your life in order before you make any decision about marriage, let alone continue to talk to people. Just my two cents.
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Post by Anonymous on Jan 19, 2018 22:49:34 GMT -5
Didnt say anything about not believing. Thanks for not staying on topic and replying with a lot of useless questions that were no help at all. You did well.
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Post by Anonymous on Jan 20, 2018 5:33:19 GMT -5
Man, you're a real charmer. Can't believe the ladies don't go for you!
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Post by Wahab on Jan 31, 2018 15:42:47 GMT -5
Just get close to your family and friends and marry any girl of any religion that is best for you in this situation . The most important thing is that you just believe in la ilaha illallah .. unfortunately the situation and the Muslim community is not helpful, the religious thought they have is wrong . And that is making even more difficulties for new reverts . You should contact me and talk to me . I will help you like a true friend and brother
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Post by Wahab on Jan 31, 2018 15:43:53 GMT -5
Contact me wahabfareed45@gmail.com
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Post by wahab on Jan 31, 2018 16:00:23 GMT -5
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Post by GFBA on Feb 26, 2018 12:10:11 GMT -5
Assalam o Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.
Look brother, pay attention to the religion, not its people. I'm horribly ashamed to say, but honestly, Muslims nowadays are really off path and not on their real path. I advise you to recite Qur'an with translation, understand it and act upon it. Women are truly like that or their families are. Pray to Allah, ask for forgiveness along the lines of Ya Ghafur ar Rahim Astaghfirullah Ta'la Rabbi min kulli zambinwa atobu Elaih. Get ba'yah from a reputable Naqushband Sheikh and follow his advices and suggestions.
Yahdikumullah, wa Yazhakumullah.
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Post by female on Nov 6, 2020 15:24:50 GMT -5
Well, I've had enough, i took shahadah 6 years ago and since then I have fallen out with family and friends, I have become more miserable as each day has gone by. I have tried to find a wife but the dozens if not hundreds of women I have spoken to, its always the same story, family wouldnt allow them to marry a white man, they know if theyre coming or going, one day they want to know everything about you, the next dont want to talk to you again. Im done with it, I'm nothing but miserable. Everyone takes your number when you convert, a week later you hear from none of them again. Im tired of this world. If I had known this is what Islam was like I really wouldnt of bothered. I thought id meet someone, I thought id be happy. Im the complete opposite. Ive never been so miserable in my life.Im not even looking for replies I just wanted to let you all know the real struggles converts face, maybe you can try harder on the next one. Im done. |
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Post by female on Nov 6, 2020 15:26:24 GMT -5
Well, I've had enough, i took shahadah 6 years ago and since then I have fallen out with family and friends, I have become more miserable as each day has gone by. I have tried to find a wife but the dozens if not hundreds of women I have spoken to, its always the same story, family wouldnt allow them to marry a white man, they know if theyre coming or going, one day they want to know everything about you, the next dont want to talk to you again. Im done with it, I'm nothing but miserable. Everyone takes your number when you convert, a week later you hear from none of them again. Im tired of this world. If I had known this is what Islam was like I really wouldnt of bothered. I thought id meet someone, I thought id be happy. Im the complete opposite. Ive never been so miserable in my life.Im not even looking for replies I just wanted to let you all know the real struggles converts face, maybe you can try harder on the next one. Im done. can i have your email id? |
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